God's Vessel — Chapter 20

Watching over Yu-yeong from up close, Cha-mu managed to piece together a few rules.

The presence that borrowed Yu-yeong's body from within came out only when she acted. No — more precisely, it seemed to emerge only when she stood before a camera.

Other than that, it never showed itself.

Whenever actress Yu-yeong's work was done, the thing retreated meekly back inside. But there was one other occasion.

It was when a man appeared within Yu-yeong's radius.

'I'm, I'm a real fan of yours!'

'Oh, oh, really?'

Whenever a decent-looking man with feelings for her approached, the thing playing actress Yu-yeong would vanish in an instant.

And then the real Yu-yeong appeared.

The presence that had filled her completely would disappear, and in the sliver of a moment before Yu-yeong's true soul could settle into the suddenly hollow space, whatever spirits lingered nearby would seize their chance and slip inside.

Of course, thanks to what Cha-mu had given her, none of them dared try it anymore, but he could still see everything that happened.

The one thing he couldn't figure out was the true identity of the thing living inside Yu-yeong. It absolutely refused to reveal itself. Hiding its form deep within her, it seemed content to do nothing but act, taking over her body only during filming.

"..."

Departed spirits rarely behaved this way. Most yeong-ga clawed at any chance to satisfy their desires. A yeong-ga without greed...

There was no such thing.

More often than not, spirits bound to this world without ascending would, as time passed, forget even why they'd been left behind, give in to their cravings, curdle into evil spirits, and be obliterated.

And yet this one had lived like that for over ten years.

"Tch."

Clicking his tongue, Cha-mu picked up his phone. The truth was, he had almost no one he exchanged private messages with. He'd never been close enough to anyone to share the mundane rhythms of daily life, never allowed a human being inside his boundary.

Such was the lonely lot of those fated to serve the gods. The path of a shaman was a bitterly solitary road walked alone.

And for him, Yu-yeong was the only being who had ever stepped into that boundary.

-Hello?

"You answered right away. Why."

-Ah...

"I told you to stay off your phone."

At his words, he could hear Yu-yeong laughing awkwardly on the other end of the line.

"Only do things that are good for your mental health."

-I'm just looking at my fans' reactions.

"You don't have any fans."

-...That's so mean.

"Mean or not, that's what I think, so get off the internet."

Cha-mu didn't know how to soften his words, and over the past month that had made things rather difficult for Yu-yeong. But a man didn't turn kind overnight, either.

Lee Cha-mu had simply been built that way.

Still, Yu-yeong apparently hadn't gotten used to it yet.

-But there are quite a few comments praising me, actually.

"Good for you."

-Yeah. They're saying I've finally matured since no scandals have broken out lately.

"Is that supposed to be praise?"

-Isn't it?

Even at Yu-yeong's sulky voice, Cha-mu gave no particular reaction.

He only hoped she wouldn't get hurt over meaningless hate comments and stew alone in her sadness.

Those who served the gods had no choice but to cherish human beings. Even when they didn't want to, they had no other option.

"Tomorrow's your day off. What are you planning to do?"

At the question, Yu-yeong shot upright as if something had just come to her.

-There's something I want to do. And you have to help me with it, oppa.

"With what?"

-Um, So-won...

So-won.

The little girl in the yellow dress was named So-won. Drawn to Cha-mu and brought back to his home, the child showed no desire to ascend at all — she simply seemed to enjoy staying at his place with Seong-min.

The reason she couldn't ascend was that her lingering grudge from this life had yet to be resolved.

"So-won?"

The moment he spoke her name, the child slipped silently into his room. Cha-mu fixed her with a cold stare.

"How many times have I told you to knock before entering someone's room?"

'Oops.'

The girl only pouted her lips at his scolding, and Yu-yeong's voice came through the phone.

-I want to grant what So-won wishes for. Remember what you said? That she can't keep staying in this world without ascending...

"..."

-And I'm off tomorrow, so...

He wanted to tell her that meddling to this degree was its own kind of illness, but he knew perfectly well that if he did, tears would come brimming to those big round eyes of hers.

And seeing that teary face would only cost him a night's sleep in its own right. So Cha-mu glanced at So-won, who was staring up at him with sparkling, hopeful eyes, and opened his mouth.

"I'll come by tomorrow morning."

-Yes! Make sure it's with So-won!

Cha-mu gave a short reply and hung up.

Working as her road manager had naturally given him more time to talk with Yu-yeong, and he made an effort to show her that the years she'd endured had not been wasted.

'The ones who borrowed your body — every one of them went somewhere good.'

'How would you know that?'

'Because if they hadn't, they'd have thrown a fit trying to steal your body for good.'

'A fit...?'

Yu-yeong had called it a relief after hearing that. Then something seemed to occur to her, and she said:

'Oh, right. Among the ones who took over my body, there was one who slowly faded, growing more and more translucent until she vanished like smoke.'

Yu-yeong nodded to herself as she recalled that moment.

'So that's what it looks like when someone resolves their grudge and ascends... Do you think the people who left that way are at peace now?'

Cha-mu had given a brief nod. After hearing that, Yu-yeong would wear a look of quiet relief from time to time. And then she began to worry about the little one, So-won, who couldn't ascend. Her gentle nature spilled out of her without a trace of filter.

Born with a vessel, yet so gentle — perhaps that was exactly why it had shattered so easily. Every time he faced Yu-yeong, Cha-mu felt as though he were looking at a child left abandoned at the water's edge.

There was no denying it.

* * *

The next morning, Yu-yeong's apartment was a flurry of preparation to welcome the child.

Yu-yeong had low self-esteem. She believed that of everything she possessed, not a single thing had been achieved through her own strength alone.

Becoming a trainee, rising to fame as an idol, becoming an actress — all of it had been accomplished by the presence living inside her.

It was an undeniable reality, no matter how much she wanted to look away. All she could do was lend out her body and watch helplessly as a stranger occupied it and acted in her stead. Perhaps that was why she had grown so docile, so determined to be good. With nothing she was capable of, she'd developed a strange compulsion to at least behave kindly.

Of course, that very struggle to be good had eventually become a bomb disguised as a virtue — the reason people said she was a troublemaker pretending to be innocent.

Even so, it was all Yu-yeong had to offer. That was the best she could do.

But ever since Cha-mu told her that the yeong-ga who had used her body had resolved their grudges and ascended peacefully... somehow it felt as though her own existence had been useful after all, and she kept finding herself smiling.

To someone who had never once felt like a useful human being, the thought that she might have value now made Yu-yeong genuinely happy.

She prepared desserts from a famous bakery, food that children would love, and slipped into a rather extravagant dress fit for a child's tastes. Tying up her long hair with a bright red ribbon made her look unmistakably like a little girl — an unfamiliar sight — but she was certain the child she'd met at the hospital would love it, and her heart fluttered.

Ding-dong.

Just past ten in the morning, the doorbell rang, and Yu-yeong dashed to the front door.

"Coming!"

When she opened the door, Cha-mu stood there in plainer clothes than usual. He looked the elaborately dressed-up Yu-yeong over for a moment, then gave a slight bow of his head.

Cha-mu wasn't exactly a man of few words, but he had never once learned how to voice what lay in his heart.

"Did, did So-won come with you?"

"Yes."

Cha-mu stepped out of his shoes and came inside. Ever since she'd started wearing the bracelet he'd given her, Yu-yeong had no more need to see yeong-ga, so she assumed the child had entered with him and led the way into the living room together.

Cha-mu glanced at the food laid out on the table and subtly furrowed his brow.

He could guess exactly what Yu-yeong was thinking. And though she couldn't see it, So-won had been plastered to her side since earlier, unable to take her eyes off her.

The dress, the red ribbon in her hair — the child seemed to love it all.

So-won stamped her feet impatiently, as if she wanted nothing more than to slip inside Yu-yeong at once, and at the sight Cha-mu let out a sigh.

It was not a good thing for a cracked vessel to keep absorbing yeong-ga. Simply put, it was the same as shortening her lifespan. Each time, the fissures in the vessel widened further — there was nothing good about it.

"I, I didn't know what So-won would like, so..."

"Do you really want to grant her wish that badly?"

"Yes."

"That's not exactly a good thing, for you."

"Still... So-won must miss her family too..."

At her words, Cha-mu's brow creased slightly. The reason So-won lingered in that hospital was simple enough. It was because she had died there.