Peering into God's Shame
The servant started in surprise and asked again.
"What? You mean Your Lordship will take her in?"
"Think about it. By your own account this child can't even do the work she's given and keeps ending up like this. Then you'll have to clean up after her again, won't you?"
"……"
The servant's lips jutted out in a pout. He was already doing exactly that, and the thought that he would keep having to do so made irritation surge up inside him.
"You have the authority to give that child orders, don't you?"
"Yes, that's right?"
"If you hold similar authority, you could simply tell her to get out of this house."
"Hmm…… but she's a child I care about."
"You call her that with your mouth. But think carefully."
Ferda tempted him.
"A jewel shines so brightly that its flaws are all the easier to see. Looking at the long term, who do you think will suffer? Your master is now basking in the title of sage and enjoying a complete change of fortune. Isn't covering and correcting such a person's defects the proper resolve of a loyal servant?"
"……"
The servant's eyes changed. Ferda's persuasion was beginning to sound oddly right. The mere fact that he was deliberating meant he had already been swayed.
Ferda decided to deliver the finishing blow.
"I'll make the decision easier for you."
He took out three gold coins and pressed them into the servant's hand.
"O-oh my! Oh mommy-mommy-mommy……!!"
The servant's eyes went round as saucers. Three whole gold coins. Commoners could till fields their entire lives and still struggle to hold even one. Receiving three at once made the man's head spin.
Yes— to cover Master's flaws, a brat like that……!
The servant cleared his throat and began rubbing his hands together with oily humility.
"Oh my, milord. What should I do?"
"It's simple. Every language has power. Just give the order. Tell her to abandon her name from this moment on."
"Oh, I understand. Kiddo. Put that down and come here!"
The girl rose from her place and walked over to the servant's side.
"Now then, you damn little brat. Listen carefully from this moment on."
At the servant's words the girl nodded.
"From now on you're abandoning your name. And from now on this gentleman will be your master. So go with him starting today. Understood?"
The girl's pupils slowly lifted to Ferda. Her unfocused, empty eyes seemed to cast a silent question toward him.
Ferda looked into those eyes and asked,
"Do you acknowledge me as your master?"
To Ferda's question the girl answered with a nod.
Nod, nod.
"Good. Confirmed."
Ferda raised his head toward the middle-aged servant. The man was still absorbed in fondling the gold coins.
"Now that the matter is settled, I'll tell you one amusing fact."
"An amusing…… fact?"
Having obtained what he wanted, it was time to reveal the truth.
"Why your master cherishes the girl you just cast out so readily, even though she's dull as a post."
"Well…… because she's pretty, I suppose……"
"No. Your master, Helus Fobidas, likes women with large breasts. He likes women who giggle and die of delight at his worthless jokes. He's a man riddled with inferiority. He prefers empty-headed women because he has no confidence he can best clever ones. And even if she is pretty, there is no reason whatsoever for him to dote on a young servant who is as lifeless as a wooden doll."
The middle-aged servant's face gradually hardened. He still could not grasp why this story was being told, yet the logic of it seemed to scream that he had made a catastrophic mistake.
"Would you believe me if I said that this girl is the very source of the insight your master possesses?"
"What do you mean? How could a dull creature like this……"
Confusion clouded his eyes. Only then did the servant realize how oblivious and desire-driven he had been— and that he had walked straight into a trap.
With trembling hands he held the three gold coins out again.
"I-I'll c-cancel. I'll return the money, so give that child back—"
"No. There's no need. And even if you returned it, you would not leave here alive."
"W-why?"
"You've understood what I said, haven't you? What you just heard is the same as peering into a god's shame. I hope you understand that as well."
There was no other conclusion. Those who peer into a god's shame must die.
The servant's face froze over.
"I'm telling you this as a measure of goodwill. It means take that money and run— quickly."
Ferda advised him with his usual cold detachment.
"The moment your master catches you, you will vanish without a trace."
"Do you believe that humans suddenly gain enlightenment?"
Ferda asked Luri.
Luri answered.
"Yes."
"Why?"
"Humans believe they live by the knowledge they accumulate over the years, yet accumulation alone is not enough to survive. I believe they have endured because there exist flashes of insight that no amount of accumulated knowledge can ever overtake."
It was a view worthy of an immortal's servant.
"You're partly right. But you're also wrong."
"In what way?"
"They say you cannot dig a well by digging a hundred times where there is no water vein. No matter how much one claims enlightenment, wisdom that never existed cannot simply spring forth."
Ferda looked down at the name on the list.
Helus Fobidas.
"This man is the same."
"If what you are saying means the Sage of Water is nothing but a scarecrow……"
Luri turned her gaze. A blonde girl of roughly her own height stood demurely nearby. Her eyes had no focus; it was impossible to tell where she was looking. It was a face perfectly suited to being called vacant.
"You mean this vacant little one is that source?"
Ferda made a small gesture as though tugging a leash.
"Have you heard of the Slave Sage?"
Humanity stores and compresses knowledge so that it may learn from the past and open the future. In Ferda's world— where one does not collide with the body— that is what they call it. Predicting the unpredictable, controlling the uncontrollable. That is the core of those who pursue knowledge, and they advance toward it by their own methods. Combining knowledge with knowledge to draw new conclusions. Excavating lost techniques through exploration and survey. Pleading with gods for the answers they desire. Or stepping into forbidden realms that must never be entered.
And of all of them, the most effective is still the forbidden realm.
Not a god's smile, not a god's kiss— but peering into a god's shame.
The girl Ferda had taken in was one who had set foot in that forbidden realm. To possess wisdom capable of shaking the world demanded an enormous price, and that price was truly simple.
Who am I?
She becomes unable to ask herself that question. It is an utterly simple inquiry, and yet it is everything. Who one is connects to the purpose for which one lives, and the purpose for which one lives becomes action. At the same time, being unable to think that thought is what allows her to survive. Unable to move on her own, unable to think on her own— ultimate knowledge and wisdom. The ultimate tool.
"That is how a Slave Sage is born."
"To lose oneself in exchange for power…… what a truly stupid choice."
"Yes. A truly stupid choice."
Ferda muttered as if the words tasted bitter. Luri could not understand why he wore such an expression.
"So what forbidden thing did she obtain to become like this?"
"Simple."
Ferda tapped the girl's head lightly.
"The Library of All Things."
"The Library of All Things?"
"Would you believe that inside this tiny head there are more books than in all of Escoleia?"
"……"
Luri glanced at the girl. Not a speck of mana, no ominous aura— just an ordinary child. If she had passed her on the road she would have dismissed her as a half-wit and walked on. More books than the Library of All Things, that collection of human intellect. She did not believe it, yet she did not object. The choice had been Ferda's, and it was Ferda's business alone.
"Look at me."
Ferda commanded the girl. Her pupils fixed on him.
"Before I grant you a name, I will issue a top-priority command."
He spoke each syllable with deliberate clarity.
"This command will be remembered like your breathing, like the beating of your heart, and it will become an absolute, unchanging truth."
She nodded.
Ferda commanded her as though intoning a spell.
"The Great Lord of Power, the Red Dragon, Grand Duke Baldrova, shall be the beginning of your existence and your end. You will devote your entire life to Her."
She nodded.
"I, Ferda Valdrova, as proxy of Grand Duke Baldrova, hold the right of command and will give you orders."
She nodded.
"However, if my actions go against Grand Duke Baldrova's convictions or oppose them, you may raise an objection. If in the end you cannot understand……"
After the briefest silence he continued.
"As a last resort, I permit you to raise the banner of revolt. Have you remembered it all?"
She nodded.
"Good. From this day forward your name is Mori."
The girl received the name Mori. A strange vitality began to stir in her pupils.
"Except for Bernel Marquis, you have succeeded in recruiting them all."
They were in the office of Baldrova Castle.
"He'll come soon enough."
"Are you certain?"
"If he still doesn't come after I've spoken as I have, then I'll simply have to give up."
There was no obsessive heat, no passion that declared he must have the man at any cost. It felt more like allowing a connection that flowed like time itself to simply flow away.
No different from the way immortals behave.
Even Luri, who could distinguish the two with perfect clarity, found herself momentarily confused.
She looked down at the paper that held four names and four ruled lines.
"So these four are the end for now?"
Ferda shook his head.
"Actually, there is one more."
"Who?"
Ferda wrote down the name of the person he had already decided upon.
- Luri Baldrova.
"You."
Luri's face contorted with genuine revulsion.
"I have not the slightest intention of standing on your side. Do not get any misconceptions simply because we have grown a little closer."
Ferda did not overlook the loyalty beneath her words.
"It's fine. That is not what I want either. Rather, I want you to remain as wary of me— and as full of hatred— as you always were."
"……What do you mean?"
"If Mori ever leads a rebellion, the one who must stand at the vanguard is you."
"……"
Luri's expression froze. The agitation was greater than when she had first been called a collaborator.
"Does that mean…… I am to kill you?"
"Yes."
"Why?"
Ferda answered.
"Unlike immortal beings such as dragons, humans are destined to die someday."
"……!"
Luri unconsciously clenched her fist. It was something she herself had once said to Baldrova.
"Because we die someday, we change, and our eyes grow clouded. When that day comes for me, I may start making excuses that everything is for the Grand Duke while filling only my own greed."
His eyes twisted with a strangely sorrowful light. They slowly lifted and settled on Luri. Those blue eyes regarded her with deep, quiet emotion. Luri felt it with absolute certainty.
"Therefore you, as Her servant, must keep watch over me."
This man was prepared to offer even his own life.
"So that my king— my fiancée— is never hurt."
Luri forced the words out through trembling lips.
"……You're saying the same things as those humans who don't know their place."
The venom slipped out before she could stop it. Yet she nodded at the proposal.
"Understood. Hearing you out, I believe I can manage that much."
"Thank you. As expected of a loyal Dragon Spawn."
"However, there is one thing you appear not to know, so I will correct it."
Luri erased the surname portion of her name. That single act meant she was not Baldrova's spawn.
"My true name is this."
- Luri Silverwind.
"Then I will take my leave……"
Luri left the office. Ferda quietly looked down at the name she had written.
I didn't expect that.
The surname Luri had recorded struck him with no small shock. When a Dragon Spawn completes the Ascension Ceremony, they receive the dragon's name as their own surname. Just as Ferda had gone from Rosnova to Valdrova, Luri should have carried the name of the one whose blood she inherited. She was not Baldrova— she was Silverwind.
That means a Silver Dragon Spawn.
If he thought about it calmly, the signs had been there. Mobility that could move in the blink of an eye. Wind-attribute magic. Everything was possible if she carried the blood of a Silver Dragon. Yet it also made no sense; the pieces refused to fit inside Ferda's mind.
The reason was simple.
Silverwind died by Baldrova's hand.
After she killed the Black Dragon Godwin, Baldrova had gone berserk. The one who sacrificed their life to stop her was none other than the Silver Dragon, Silverwind.
Because of that they were practically bitter enemies.
The reason Baldrova became known as an evil dragon was possible only because Silverwind's faction had wielded such strong influence. He had many spawns and excellent renown.
A Silver Dragon Spawn swore loyalty to a Red Dragon……
Ferda rested his hand on the armrest and tapped his chin thoughtfully.
Does that mean she is only pretending to be loyal?
He immediately rejected the thought.
Luri is more loyal than anyone.
There was no room for doubt. The way she took every burden upon herself for a master who stood alone could never be sustained by mere duty.
Then does it mean that as a Silver Dragon Spawn she is rejecting her own blood?
He rejected that as well. Blood is thicker than water. That saying held even more absolute force in dragon society than among humans.
I don't know.
Ferda traced back through his future. Come to think of it, a few things had always bothered him. It was the time he had gone to kill Baldrova.
At that time, Luri was not there.
The castle that had been built was half-destroyed, and inside the lair waited only Baldrova, who seemed to be waiting solely for death. Even in the moment she was dying, Luri never appeared.
I would like to know the reason, but……
To the Ferda of that time it had been a matter of no interest, so there was no way to know. For now he knew only one fact: that this utterly loyal girl would someday turn her back on Baldrova.
It may be something I need to learn.
Whether he liked it or not, it was something that would undoubtedly bring sorrow to his partner. Ferda did not hesitate.
The next day, a single carriage arrived before Baldrova Castle.
Bernel Marquis had arrived.