Rings Cast into the Waves
“Fuck, what am I supposed to do? Just toss them?”
I swallowed hard without meaning to. He looked ready to explode at any second.
“Maybe a refund… isn’t possible?”
“Ha.”
Kwon Hyun-jin let out a hollow, disbelieving laugh. I was sorry, but nothing else came to mind besides a refund.
For a long while he said nothing, just staring down at the ring on his own finger.
If he’d thrown one of his usual tantrums I would have felt less guilty. Kwon Hyun-jin had swallowed his pride and chosen compromise because he wanted those couple rings that badly.
“What if we switch them for something ordinary?”
“……”
“Thin ones. Ones that don’t show at all.”
I stiffly shook my head. The couple rings he’d brought were certainly unique and eye-catching, but the design had never been the real problem.
I was terrified of our relationship becoming visible to the world. Of walking around wearing the proof of it on my body.
I was afraid someone would see them and guess about us, that the world would discover I had stolen Kwon Hyun-jin. And that they would take him away from me again…
A piercing gaze dropped to my hand. I was already holding the couple ring I had pulled off my finger.
Looking at the ring I was about to return, he muttered emptily,
“You’re really something at making a person feel like absolute shit, Lee Na-hee.”
Kwon Hyun-jin rose from the bench and snatched the ring from me. Then he yanked off his own as well and flung them both into the sea.
I watched the rings fly far out and plop into the waves.
Having discarded them in an instant, Kwon Hyun-jin turned away from the water without a shred of regret. He picked up my bag from the bench and asked as if nothing had happened,
“What do you want for dinner.”
“Hyun-jin…”
I felt like a capital criminal. I was just watching him carefully, not knowing what to do, when Kwon Hyun-jin spoke with his gaze lowered.
“Let’s pretend it never happened.”
“I’m sorry. You just prepared it so suddenly.”
“Let’s stop talking about the rings.”
He cut me off abruptly.
“I don’t want to fight with you.”
I could feel him holding his temper in check. This trip had been rocky from the very start. The whole time it felt as precarious as walking on thin ice.
“Where do you want to go for dinner.”
“……”
“You like seafood, right. Let’s go back to the hotel and do a course.”
Kwon Hyun-jin took my hand. Even without the rings, his large hand was still warm and affectionate.
When I pulled away he stopped walking at once.
“Why.”
“It’s cold. I was going to link arms…”
Only then did his stiff expression ease. He took my hand and slipped it into the pocket of his coat. It was much warmer.
As we walked toward the parking lot a snack shop suddenly caught my eye. The sign said “Fish-cake croquettes.”
“Want to eat that? That stuff’s really good.”
“Hey.”
Kwon Hyun-jin stopped in his tracks again. Judging by the way he addressed me, something had rubbed him the wrong way.
“Fuck, you’ve been to Busan before, haven’t you.”
“……”
I’d been found out. The reason Kwon Hyun-jin had hounded me so relentlessly about taking a trip was because he wanted to share first experiences with me. A trip was the one place you could experience the location, the food, the scenery—everything about a moment—for the first time together.
But Busan wasn’t my first. It was my second.
“Who did you come with.”
“Ji-yul…”
“When?”
“…Last year.”
“Ha.”
The corners of Kwon Hyun-jin’s eyes twisted. I hurriedly explained.
“You’re studying all day, so I felt weird saying I was going out to play… And it was just a day trip.”
“Fucking deflating.”
“Sorry…”
His jawline grew sharper as he stared into empty air. Even so, he didn’t push my hand out of his coat.
“What about that bastard Kim Chang-jin?”
“He couldn’t go because his dog was sick.”
“If he’d been fine he would’ve gone with you?”
The sudden question threw me. Under that thoroughly skewed gaze I realized I had misspoken.
“Of course I would never go with him.”
I corrected myself belatedly, but it was already too late. The eyes fixed on me flared hotly.
“So you’ve done Haeundae, Yonggungsa, Gijang—all of it.”
“Yeah…”
“Ha… The hot springs too?”
“Right before catching the train… because I wanted to wash up.”
We had left before dawn, before the sun even rose, and thoroughly covered every corner of Busan.
In truth Ji-yul and I were experts at day-trip railway travel. Besides Busan we had been to Yeosu, Jeonju, Gangneung—everywhere. I had tried my best not to let it show, but I’d been found out in the most ridiculous way.
“B-but seeing it again, it’s completely new, you know? Back then it was summer so it was different from now. Let’s go to a café and look at the night view. Gamcheon Culture Village is really pretty too.”
“No. Not going.”
“Why… We came all this way. We said we’d go everywhere. Come on, please?”
“You go enjoy yourself all you want.”
He was thoroughly sulking with no sign of letting it go. Still, he seemed to have some destination in mind, because the moment he got in the car he buckled his seatbelt.
“You slept plenty in the car earlier, Lee Na-hee.”
“You said it was okay to sleep…”
“Yeah.”
He’d been the one to recline the seat for me himself. At the time I hadn’t known what he was scheming. I’d thought it was consideration.
“Don’t sleep once we get to the hotel.”
That meaningful voice foreshadowed a relentless night.
The hotel Kwon Hyun-jin had booked was a corner suite with a panoramic view of Gwangan Bridge. The view was so spectacular it looked as if someone had pasted a photograph across the entire wall.
“Wow…”
I was almost entranced by the incredible prospect. Kwon Hyun-jin, who had looked proud at first, later managed to sulk about even that.
Even a seven-year-old’s moodiness would have been milder than his.
“Go on. Sightsee all you want.”
“Hnnngh…”
He followed me straight into the bathroom and started the first round of sex right there. This incredible room had a view even from the bathroom. Kwon Hyun-jin sat me on the edge of the tub and entered me there.
“What are you closing your eyes for. You’re supposed to look at the night view, Na-hee.”
Even in that uncomfortable position he thrust his hips so tenaciously that it seemed he intended to do nothing but have sex the entire time, just as he’d warned.
And my prediction was perfectly correct.
The moment we stepped out of the bathroom he ordered room service, fed me, then declared I wasn’t allowed to lie down yet and sat me on his lap. Kwon Hyun-jin was between my legs as he sat on the sofa.
“Haa, Lee Na-hee, why do your tits seem bigger?”
Kwon Hyun-jin, who had buried his face between my breasts for a long while, finally lifted his head. Grabbing one breast in each hand, he shook them demonstratively.
As the flesh rippled like waves my face burned hot.
“You really are a pervert…”
“Look at this. They got bigger.”
“It’s because it’s before.”
“Before having sex with me?”
“No—before ‘that day.’”
“Ah. That day.”
Grinning, Kwon Hyun-jin rubbed his nose against my nipple, then suddenly took it into his mouth. He sucked on it with his lips the way you’d eat jelly, stretched the peak out long, then licked it with his tongue, repeating the motion.
“Hnn.”
“If I don’t use a condom right now you could get pregnant.”
What kind of fantasy was he having. The gaze fixed solely on my nipple grew murky.
“You’ll make a lot of milk.”
Kwon Hyun-jin’s face, wearing a sly smile, turned toward me belatedly.
“You look like the type. Later, when you get pregnant.”
He spoke as if pregnancy were our near-future plan.
“We shouldn’t have a kid now, right?”
I hadn’t even considered the possibility. It was so absurd I didn’t feel it was worth answering.
“Right, Na-hee.”
But Kwon Hyun-jin seemed to think there was a sliver of hope in that and tried to confirm it again.
“We shouldn’t?”
“Absolutely… no. We can’t.”
“Yeah. I figured.”
Answering nonchalantly, Kwon Hyun-jin kissed the left protrusion, then the right, in turn.
“For the time being, they’re all mine. Nice.”
Not “for the time being”—it wouldn’t happen for at least ten years.
No… between me and Kwon Hyun-jin, something like pregnancy would never happen. Ever.