I'll Do My Best

Having eaten their fill at dinner, Leila and Kyle strolled the night streets with an ice cream each in hand. Even when she told him he ought to hurry back and prepare for tomorrow, Kyle was stubbornly unmoved.

"Helping the food settle is preparing properly for tomorrow."

He answered with such brazen confidence that Leila could not argue.

"Then just a little walk. But Kyle."

"Yeah?"

"Why do you want to marry me?"

With lips still carrying the cool, sweet aftertaste of ice cream, Leila asked carefully.

"If it's because you feel sorry for me…"

"Leila Lewellin."

The way he spoke her name was cold in a way that was not like Kyle at all. While she stood startled, he stepped in front of her and blocked her path.

"Do I look like the kind of madman who'd marry someone out of pity?"

The sharp, unfamiliar look on Kyle's face frightened her into silence.

"Fine. The world's a big place and full of madmen, so I suppose someone like that exists. But Leila — at least I'm not him."

Kyle drew a deep breath, as if forcing down his anger.

"Why? Because I love you."

"Kyle…"

"That's my only reason. Because I love Leila Lewellin."

Looking down at her tense face, Kyle sighed and gave a short, dry laugh.

"And who would feel sorry for whom, anyway? I've already been turned down hundreds of times. Me, feel sorry for you? The pitiful one is me, Leila."

He ruffled her hair lightly and started walking a step ahead. He was surely wearing an utterly foolish expression and had no wish to let her see it. Understanding that, Leila kept the one-step distance and followed behind him.

They walked in silence until they found themselves once more in front of the hotel.

"Go on in."

Kyle turned back with a smile restored to his face.

"Ah — come to think of it, I haven't done it today."

He glanced down at the melting ice cream cup, then slowly lifted his eyes.

"Marry me, Leila."

Even knowing he would be refused, it had become so much a part of his daily routine that skipping it felt strange. Yet Leila, who should have greeted him with an easy "Good night, Kyle," remained oddly quiet.

Kyle narrowed his eyes and watched her carefully. The gentle yet merciless answer — I won't marry you — ought to have come from those lips. Instead they parted slowly, and words he could hardly believe reached his ears.

"Yes."

"…Leila?"

Startled, Kyle dropped the ice cream cup he had been holding. The melted ice cream soiled the tip of his shoe, but that hardly mattered.

"Y-you mean… you'll marry me?"

When he stammered the question back, Leila lowered her eyes and nodded.

"Marry me? You will? With me?"

He asked again in a trembling voice. Looking embarrassed, she nodded once more, smaller this time.

Leila tried to say something more, but Kyle let out a whoop that was nearly a howl and swept her up into his arms.

"Wooooaaaah!"

Passersby in front of the hotel jumped and stared; Leila herself cried out in surprise. Kyle paid none of it any mind, spinning her around and around in his arms.

The breeze that blew that night was fragrant with spring.

That night Kyle dreamed. He dreamed of marrying Leila, of living as the Etmans — an ordinary, happy everyday life.

Once, Leila had said that if she ever had a home of her own someday, far in the future, she would like a little flower bed. She had smiled shyly and said how happy she would be if the roses she tended there put down deep roots and bloomed.

In the dream he saw her tending exactly that flower bed. Children ran and played beside a Leila more beautiful than the full-blown roses. The sunlight was clear and the children's laughter bright.

Daddy—!

A child who had spotted Kyle came toddling toward him at a run — a pretty little girl with golden hair like Leila's and his. A still-smaller child, just learning to walk, bounced in place and welcomed him.

On the path toward Leila with his daughter lifted high in his arms, a soft wind blew. That wind carried the sweet scent of roses. Leila looked at him and smiled — more beautifully even than that beautiful dream.

Kyle woke still wrapped in the afterglow of it. Perhaps because of that happiness, he did far better on the exam than he had expected. That the dream would soon become reality — how could such a vast blessing even exist in the world?

By the time he left the examination hall he felt he might actually take flight. And the moment he saw Leila waiting for him on a bench outside the building, he truly did feel as if he had lifted off the ground.

"Leila!"

When he called her name loudly she lifted her head. She folded the little book she had been reading, tucked it into the bag slung across her shoulder, and came toward him with light, easy steps.

"How was it? Was the exam hard? Do you think you did well?"

"You worry about the strangest things."

Kyle lifted his chin in deliberate arrogance.

"Leila, I am Kyle Etman. That Kyle Etman who has never learned how to come in second at studying."

"Ahhh. Yeeees. Of course you are."

Leila burst out laughing at last.

"I seem to have forgotten for a moment about the brilliant Mr. Etman."

"Wow. Now I'm hurt. Kindly remember from now on, always."

He teased and casually took her hand. She flinched as if startled, yet did not pull away. The late-afternoon spring sunlight caught on the curve of Kyle's overflowing smile and dazzled.

"You really did do well on the exam, right?"

Still a little anxious, she asked carefully, and the cuteness of it made Kyle smile.

"Don't worry. There won't be any disaster where only I fail and we can't attend university together."

"That isn't what I meant…"

A faint flush rose in both of Leila's cheeks. The thought that they would be as sweet as a ripe peach made Kyle's throat suddenly dry. He regretted that they were on campus. On a quiet street he might have found the courage to kiss her. No — if he did something like that without care she would only flinch and draw back. He would have to wait a little longer.

Right. Think of the shovel handle.

Kyle decided to think of the shovel handle. That massive, dirt-caked shovel handle and Uncle Bill's bone-chilling smile.

Hands tightly clasped, the two of them walked the campus at a leisurely pace — from the medical building where Kyle would study to the biology building where Leila would study. They measured the distance, laughed, and chattered excitedly.

"You'll definitely pass, but it might be a little hard for me."

When they reached the biology building Leila whispered in a serious tone.

"Why worry about that? You said the exam went fine."

"It did, but they accept so few female students."

Her face pouted. Kyle let out a short "Ah" and nodded.

"That's true enough."

The empire's universities had only begun admitting women a few years earlier. Even then they selected so few that the threshold was far higher for female students.

"But you'll pass."

Kyle spoke with absolute certainty.

"If not you, then who would they take?"

"Aren't you being a little too confident?"

"Not at all. It's a highly reliable conclusion drawn from eight years of accumulated time."

"Eight years… Has it really been that long already?"

She could still picture with perfect clarity the road she had taken by post carriage toward Arvis, and yet so many years had already slipped past. Looking at the young man standing before her — grown so tall — Leila suddenly felt the change anew.

"What is it?"

A little embarrassed under her intent gaze, Kyle asked awkwardly.

"You've grown so much."

Leila still looked serious with wonder. Sometimes, when Leila Lewellin said such unexpected things, she was so lovable that Kyle felt as if soft down were drifting through his chest and he did not know what to do with himself. In moments like this he truly had no idea how to act.

"Yeah."

He huffed a quiet laugh and nodded.

"Grown enough to be your husband."

At the lightly added words he heard her suck in a sharp breath.

"Do you like it?"

"That… I don't really know."

Flustered, Leila hurried her stiffened steps forward. Watching her shy retreat, the smile in Kyle's eyes grew brighter and warmer still.

On the way back, Kyle spoke of the beautiful dreams that would soon become real — the house they would share, their everyday life, the pretty children who would one day be born, the new history of the Etman family they would make together. He liked the careful hope that began to fill Leila's eyes. He wanted desperately to make that hope into reality. The rather silly, sentimental thought even crossed his mind that perhaps he had been born into this world for that very purpose.

"How many children would be good? I'd like both a daughter and a son."

"Hmm… I think about five?"

The number, so at odds with her shy manner, left Kyle flustered. But Leila only smiled brightly and went on.

"If there were that many children, no one would be lonely. They'd have each other to lean on. And if the house were full of faces that looked like one another, I think I'd really love that."

She looked so bright that Kyle's heart ached a little more. Over that radiant smile he seemed to see the lonely years she had lived.

"Five, huh… All right, Leila. I'll do my best!"

"Huh?"

At the sudden, ringing vow, Leila's eyes went round. They stared blankly at each other, then both flushed almost at the same time.

"Th-that's not what I meant!"

Even redder than she was, Kyle stepped backward.

"Don't go thinking that's all I ever think about!"

"I didn't either!"

Leila shot back, equally flustered.

Unable to meet each other's eyes, they now walked a step apart, hands no longer joined. Glancing sideways at Leila's prim profile, Kyle finally lost the battle and burst out laughing.

"But Leila — you're this embarrassed just talking about it, and you still decided to make five babies?"

She gasped, whipped her head around, and glared at him with a scowl.

"You can't seriously think the stork delivers all five. Not our Miss Lewellin, who knows everything except geometry."

When he teased her more wickedly still, Leila set off at a quick, stiff little trot, face thoroughly furrowed. The increasingly rapid click of her heels was joined by Kyle's growing, delighted laughter.

"Wait for me, Mrs. Etman!"

The playful shout rang out across the spring campus. Leila began to run in earnest. The single braid hanging down her back swung cheerfully.

Kyle treasured that retreating figure with his eyes. He felt as if he had stepped back into that beautiful dream. He did not want to wake. Not ever.