Chapter 21
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Translator: Vine
Chapter: 21
Chapter Title: A Fiery Friday Encounter
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Seeing their reaction, I knew instantly.
It was definitely the person who wrote that post.
"Oh, please have a seat here first."
The manager hurriedly led me to a corner table.
I didn't cross my legs, but leaned slightly against the backrest, adopting a polite yet relaxed posture.
Anyway, I'd listen, and if it wasn't right, I'd just leave.
To make me their slave, they'd at least need a supervisory professor title.
But now I was a high school graduate, invincible with absolute immunity to supervisory professors.
"Um, did you perhaps come after seeing something on the ○○ website?"
"No, I happened to be passing by, and a friend suddenly told me to check this place out."
"Ah, I see..."
They seemed to believe me.
"At first, I laughed, thinking what kind of ridiculous condition that was, but my friend said since I was passing by anyway, I might as well check it out, just in case. Is it really true?"
I gave off the impression that I was about to get up at any moment.
If they said, 'Haha, it's a misunderstanding,' I was ready to leave immediately.
Anyway, I'd rented this suit for 30% of its original price thanks to a female employee I'd never met before giving me a discount.
"Of course, it's true. But there's a condition. You need to work steadily for at least two years, no, at least one year."
"With conditions like that, it'd be great to work for a year or two, or even longer. In this kind of economic downturn, who would refuse such terms?"
"You might think it's too much, but I've found that when I hire handsome male staff, sales increase several times over. I'm confident in that experience, which is why I'm offering such exceptional terms."
The owner explained with such fervor that he seemed to be spitting.
"People subtly don't realize. In a business like a cafe, if handsome men like you work here, the sales difference is insane."
"Is it that much?"
"Do you have any part-time experience?"
"Yes, I've done bioequivalence part-time work."
"Bioequivalence...?"
"Taking new drugs. It's like human trials."
"Gasp. You don't look like you'd ever need to do something like that, why on earth..."
"I wasn't the one taking the drugs, I was just guiding people."
"Ah, I see. That makes sense."
We ironed out the detailed conditions.
Workdays: Monday to Friday, hours: 9 AM to 6 PM.
The 40% net profit incentive was only for sales generated during my working hours.
I naturally agreed to this.
"But do I really just have to sit there like a totem pole?"
"Still, customers will think you're staff, so you should at least pretend to serve in the hall..."
"I was thinking the same thing."
"Oh, wow, as expected from a handsome person, you're easy to talk to and straightforward."
Jung Hyena works 9 to 6, five days a week.
Though overtime often occurs randomly on weekends, nights, and early mornings.
This much would allow me to spend my time productively while Jung Hyena was at work.
"When can you start working...?"
"Today's Friday, so I'll start next Monday. I just need to be a faithful totem, right?"
"Of course. My part-timers and I will handle all the difficult tasks."
"From Monday, please feel free to speak informally."
"Ah, I will."
I subtly glanced over and saw the part-timers holding their breath, watching us.
It was only my third day of being a Very Handsome Man, but I was starting to get a general sense of the atmosphere.
I walked towards the counter and greeted them with a sociable smile.
"I'll be starting work on Monday. Please take good care of me."
"Kyaa, really?"
"Wow, that's great! I really hoped we'd work together. Let's really, really do well!"
As I finished my greetings and was about to leave, the owner asked.
"But you look like you'd succeed as a celebrity. You must have received a lot of offers like that, right?"
"No, I've never received any."
"All those entertainment agency scouts must be blind. No wonder new idol groups these days are all like that."
***
I stopped by the photo studio right next to the cafe to take an ID photo.
This way, I'd made good use of the rented suit and my travel route.
Come to think of it, it's Fiery Friday.
Since I'd already rented the suit, I might as well get the most out of it.
I'd always had a romantic fantasy about a suit date.
A cool beer at a bustling pub after work, dressed in suits, with a girlfriend I was secretly dating at the office.
Even if you weren't a former Never-been-kissed Virgin, everyone probably had hundreds of such fantasies.
From now on, I'd start ticking off my bucket list, one by one.
I called Jung Hyena.
"Are you up?"
"Yes. Are you outside?"
"Yeah, I just took an ID photo and did some other stuff. It's Fiery Friday, want to grab a beer outside?"
"Sounds great! I'll get ready and leave right away. You go on ahead, Oppa."
"Do you happen to have a suit?"
"Huh, why? If I knew why, I'd..."
"I'm wearing a suit right now. I rented it to take an ID photo."
"A suit, you said? Right now?"
"Yeah. So, I thought it'd be nice if you matched me..."
"Kyaa! Of course! Oh my goodness, oh my goodness. Oppa in a suit. This is a Genesis-level event!"
Lee Chang-woo must have worn nothing but slacks his whole life.
Still, a "Genesis-level event" was a bit much.
***
Hwang A-young was spending her Fiery Friday in Gangnam at a bar with her female friends.
"It's already the sixth day. He's never gone silent for this long, you know? His phone's still off, and he hasn't even checked his Star DMs."
"You say that like Lee Chang-woo ever checked them."
"He's not actually dead, is he?"
"Hey! Don't say unlucky things!"
"As if Lee Chang-woo only had one or two enemies everywhere."
"What did Chang-woo do wrong? If they were even a fraction as handsome as Chang-woo, would those girls have been so easily distracted?"
"But it's true that Chang-woo gets a raw deal. He's just minding his own business, and these taken women start wagging their tails, and then their boyfriends get pissed off and give him hell."
Kim Ju-ri rested her chin on her hand and glanced at Hwang A-young, speaking.
"I think he got married. Secretly."
"Don't say unlucky things. Chang-woo isn't like that."
"Hey, honestly, what does Chang-woo have besides his face?"
Seo Yu-min quietly spoke from beside them.
"With Chang-woo's face, women would line up to support him even if he had 100 billion won in debt. So, yeah, he has everything."
"Anyway! I'm telling you, Chang-woo got married. You saw the pictures of the house he lives in, right? There's no way he could afford to rent or whatever that place. Some rich Gangnam sugar mama took him in."
"Hey, Chang-woo absolutely despises women who work in bars, saying they're dirty. What are you even saying?"
Just then, Kim Ju-ri lowered her body close, rapidly tapping the table with her palm.
"Hey, hey, holy shit. Super handsome guy spotted. Cut the chatter immediately."
"What? Where?"
"For us, it's at 3 o'clock, Hwang A-young, for you, it's 9 o'clock. Turn your eyes subtly."
The three women quickly locked their Very Handsome Man sensors onto the target.
A tall, Very Handsome Man, who seemed to have just left a nearby company, was looking for an empty seat, his dark navy suit fitting him impeccably.
A height reaching mid-180s.
A small head boasting perfect nine-head body proportion, and facial features so harmoniously arranged it was a mystery how they were put together.
Featureless horn-rimmed glasses, which would have been a symbol of a nerd if worn by anyone else.
But when worn by this picturesque Very Handsome Man with his hair neatly swept back with pomade, they became a symbol of a Brainy and Sexy Man.
"Holy shit. Amazing. Super amazing."
"Wow, there's an office worker like that in Gangnam? No, why is he working at a company? Why? Why? Why?"
"Hey, hey, he seems to be alone. Should we go talk to him?"
Before long, the Very Handsome Man found a seat and sat down.
But no sooner had he sat down than girls in their early twenties were already approaching him and striking up conversations.
"Wow, look how flustered he is. So innocent."
"He's really different from how he looks."
"He's really handsome. Lee Chang-woo can't even compare."
"Shut up. It's true he's handsome, and he's on Chang-woo's level, but 'can't even compare to Chang-woo'... Wait a minute? Isn't that Chang-woo?"
"Bullshit. Ah, but he does look a bit like Chang-woo."
"I think it is Chang-woo? It's ridiculous for two people who look like that to exist on Earth."
"So why would Chang-woo be here?"
"It is Chang-woo. Take off the glasses, take off the suit, take off the pomade, and put the filter back on. Isn't it Chang-woo?"
"Hey. Chang-woo has 1.5 vision, why would he wear glasses? And have you ever seen him wear a suit? He always dresses like a hobo in ragged clothes, but he's still handsomely picturesque, sigh, I suddenly miss Chang-woo."
"I'm telling you it's Chang-woo. He married a rich woman, and she's dressing him up like that. Am I right?"
Seo Yu-min strongly insisted, and her two friends groaned, glaring at the Very Handsome Man.
Already, for the third time, women were approaching him, whether to ask for his number or join his table, they were talking to him.
"It... might be him."
"Two men who look like that cannot exist on Earth. That's a sign of doom."
"Looking at his face and how he gets hit on every second, it seems like him, but looking at his style, it doesn't."
"Chang-woo doesn't have a twin brother or any lookalikes, does he?"
"I don't think so?"
"Hey! Get up. We can just go ask him."
"Okay. Let's go."
"A-young's completely fixated now."
***
These horn-rimmed glasses have no prescription.
I bought them cheaply because last time at the pub, I was so overwhelmed by people asking for my number that I had to leave quickly.
But it's strange.
It seems like even more women are flocking to me than last time.
Should I buy a ring and wear it on my ring finger?
I put my earphones in and closed my eyes.
Just plugged them in, no music playing, a mere disguise.
Still, it worked.
Being a Very Handsome Man is tiresome in its own way.
There's nothing that's purely good.
Still, if I were reborn, I'd want this face again.
I was secretly looking forward to what Jung Hyena would wear.
Seeing how she almost fainted with joy at the mention of a suit, it seemed she'd show me something ambitious.
A double suit date would be ideal, but it didn't strictly matter if it wasn't.
I could save that pleasure for next time.
We still had plenty of time.
Today, I was going to do something I'd really wanted to do.
Drink beer and chat happily with my pretty girlfriend on a Fiery Friday in Gangnam.
And then go straight to a motel for an overnight stay.
Not a motel stay for a business trip to the provinces, but finally going to a motel with a woman for the very first time.
And at the motel...
"Lee Chang-woo?"
At first, I didn't realize they were calling my name.
I'd used a different name for over 32 years, how could I react to being called Lee Chang-woo in just three days?
In hindsight, that was actually fortunate.
"Lee Chang-woo. Lee Chang-woo. It's Chang-woo, right?"
Since I was already wearing earphones, I pretended not to hear, but then they started tapping the table to get my attention.
It would be strange to keep pretending not to know, so I took out my earphones and turned around.
Three women.
The woman with long, straight hair in the middle was looking at me with venomous eyes.
The short-haired woman on the left looked intrigued.
The woman with her hair tied back on the right was gauging the long-haired woman's reaction and mine.
The long-haired woman pressed, asking.
"Lee Chang-woo. Why aren't you answering your calls?"
The long-haired woman roughly grabbed my hand, which was resting on the table.
Thanks to that, I saw something I didn't particularly want to know, but already did.
[Hwang A-young]
[Age: 24]
[Height: 166cm, Weight: 50kg, G-cup]
[Base Libido: B]
[Affection for me: S]
[My Oral Ejaculation: 42 times]
[My Vaginal Ejaculation: 43 times]
[Special Notes: No anal sex experience, last vaginal ejaculation 8 days 3 hours ago]
They say it's dopamine when you can clearly predict what a woman will say next?
I'll take that back.
Right now, my brain cells were probably pumping out massive amounts of adrenaline, like a rabbit encountering its natural predator.
Shit, what do I say?
What can I say to get out of this situation?
Saying I'm not Chang-woo would be useless,
Wait?
What's something Chang-woo would absolutely never say?
"Was kann ich für Sie tun?"
(What can I do for you?)
"He... he sounds German?"
"See? I told you it wasn't Chang-woo."