Why Did You Save Me?

Managing Director Han was always meticulously polite to his subordinates and the household staff, yet people were far more wary of him than of any rage-prone boss who flew into tantrums. The longer someone had worked under him, the more pronounced that caution became. Mrs. Song asked carefully,

“You seem to have caught a chill outside. Would you like to take a bath and rest?”

Managing Director Han rubbed his eyes briefly to ease the look of fatigue, then nodded.

“Then please fill the tub with hot water, and bring some tea and fruit over there. And Chief Choi, after contacting Director Park Won-ju to come here, please update me on the calls I’ve received……”

“Yes, Managing Director.”

“Please also prepare a caffeine supplement. The discussion looks like it will run long.”

Lee-won sank deep into the hot water and closed his eyes. His whole body felt as if it were melting like butter. The fatigue that had piled up for nearly two weeks surged over him like a million-strong army, making his mind grow hazy. The piercing cold that had sliced into his flesh now seemed to be leaving his body at last, sending delayed shudders racing through him a couple of times. Each time, the memories from the bridge clawed at his brain, but Lee-won shook his head and forced them away. It was time to plug back into his densely packed daily life.

Knock knock knock.

Just as he thought he might have dozed off, a knock came at the bathroom door. A soft, fragrant scent of tea tickled his nose. Chief Choi entered carrying a tray with a teapot, teacup, and a neatly decorated apple. He gently parted the shower curtain, set the tray on the cypress wood cover over the tub, then drew the curtain again and stepped back.

“Thank you, Chief Choi.”

Mrs. Song’s tea-brewing skill was truly first-rate. Ordinarily she would bring chamomile for a good night’s sleep, but considering he still had appointments, she had sent black tea instead.

Mrs. Song was one of the few people who understood his needs and tastes well. The small teapot and cup, bright with a deep purple rose pattern, suited the red tea perfectly. The translucent carmine color indicating the optimal strength, the sweet and elegant fragrance that clung to the tip of his nose, all blended with the gold trim and the lavish red floral motifs to maximize the satisfaction of all five senses.

He drank the tea slowly while still immersed in the tub. Since he could barely taste it, he had to content himself with the gentle aroma alone. He also put a piece of the apple from the plate into his mouth. His mouth felt as rough as if filled with sand, yet slowly savoring the apple—sliced with fine cuts into a flower shape—with his eyes and its crisp texture was one of the few luxuries he could still enjoy.

Lee-won had learned early that the law of diminishing marginal utility applied powerfully to stimuli and pleasure, and so he strove to live a life of restraint regarding peripheral joys. Yet given his innate temperament, abandoning even the refined and aesthetic luxuries was difficult.

“Chief Choi, while my phone was off, did you take any calls for me?”

“Yes, Managing Director. About a hundred calls came in.”

“We hardly need a call center. ……Please tell me the urgent ones first.”

“The directors who were in the conference room earlier, Director Woo Seong-hee, Managing Director Woo Il-hyuk, CEO Wang Cheol-seong of Sekyung Heavy Industries, Office Manager Kim Min-seok of the Lee-won Mecenat Foundation, Director Kang Seok-ju of the art museum, and Director Jeong Jae-gyeong of the Seoul Regional Scholarship Hall also called. Managing Director Kim Seok-woo of Sekyung Holdings and Manager Choi Gyeong-sik and Deputy Manager Na Eon-hee of the Public Relations Planning Department called saying we need to confirm whether the contents of the will are true and set guidelines for the press release.”

“Yes.”

“Father Jeong Sang-yong from the parish called. He said he’d like to see you when you have time.”

“Ah, yes. I roughly told him about the will earlier. It’s probably about that.”

“He was worried about whether you were all right, and said to come to the rectory anytime, no matter how late.”

“Yes, I’ll contact Father myself and go see him.”

“And your great-uncle and great-aunt in Pildong asked to be notified as soon as you returned. They were very worried that they couldn’t reach you, saying you must not be feeling well. And there were seven people who asked for you without identifying themselves. Judging by the unregistered numbers and how rude and pushy they all were, they were probably reporters, but if they said they were reporters they’d obviously get blocked……”

“Ahh…… yes.”

I have to remember all of this one by one, but already it’s spinning and fading. Worried because they couldn’t reach me? A passing dog would laugh. How many of them are truly worried about me? They’re all just testing which side to line up with—Managing Director Woo or me.

What should I say when I call back? The landmines in the will are too fatal to use this as a chance to test loyalty. And why are unregistered numbers approaching so freely? Where has security been breached?

“And Miss Yu Mi-hyun called five times. I held her off for now by saying I’d contact her when you arrived, though she wanted to come here and wait……”

“Yes, you did…… well. For now……”

Even in his dazed state, Lee-won desperately tried to set the priorities correctly.

“Please notify the relatives first that I’ve returned. Tell them I’ll call Pildong once things are sorted out, and if Mi-hyun comes to the house, have her wait in the first-floor reception room and don’t let her come up to the second floor……”

The first floor, with its hall, reception room, dining room, and guest rooms, was a place where outsiders frequently came and went, but the second floor was his private space consisting of his bedroom and study. Unauthorized people were not allowed to set foot there, and Mi-hyun had never once come up here either.

“I’ll have to meet the Holdings directors in person to persuade them…… so please schedule individual meetings. I won’t meet Managing Director Woo Il-hyuk until the board meeting. Ask Manager Choi and Deputy Manager Na…… for a thorough security hold…… an embargo request, um, and for Director Woo Seong-hee…… I’ll call her right away, uhm……”

A soft plop sounded, and his words cut off abruptly.

Hong-yeon, who had been waiting a moment, gently parted the curtain and sighed. A half-eaten apple slice floated on the water, and Managing Director Han had melted into sleep with his head bowed.

He must have been terribly tired. To fall asleep like this even after drinking black tea.

Managing Director Han had been suffering from terrible insomnia for several years. Without sleep aids it was hard to fall asleep, so he had the habit of sitting and drinking chamomile tea until his body melted soft and limp in the hot water. The household staff never woke him if they saw him sleeping, even if the sky were to split in two.

“No matter how busy you are, it’s best you get some sleep first, Managing Director.”

Hong-yeon retrieved the apple from the water, lowered the temperature setting a little, and quietly closed the bathroom door.

From the moment he left the bathroom, an uneasy feeling began to crawl up insidiously. This emotion mixed with anxiety and restlessness had no reason, and that made it feel all the more ominous. Lee-won paced back and forth in the living room. But the foreboding only grew uncontrollably larger.

Could it be……?

Lee-won drove straight back to Mapo Bridge, then slammed on the brakes in horror.

“G-good heavens!”

Lee-won turned on the hazard lights and pulled the car over to the edge of the bridge. His premonition had been right. A small girl in a school uniform, leaning her body toward the Han River, came clearly into view. Jin Woo-yeon, the girl he had seen earlier. In the same spot where she had stood before, looking far more precarious now. Her short hair framing her face fluttered wildly in the wind, whipping against her cheeks.

“Just a moment, wait. Don’t do it, just a moment!”

Lee-won vaulted up onto the sidewalk and began to run. His voice was hoarse and wouldn’t come out properly.

“Mister, you were wrong. Everything you said was wrong……!”

“What are you talking about? Hey, Miss Jin Woo-yeon!”

“You thought just catching me from falling into the water would be enough, right? You thought I’d eat well and live well on my own, right? You thought giving money would solve every problem……”

“What’s wrong with you! Wait, listen to me. Just wait a second! There has to be a way!”

Lee-won shouted urgently, but Woo-yeon shook her head pitifully.

“No, Mister! If it were a problem that could be solved that simply, I wouldn’t have come looking for a place like the Bridge of Life in the first place!”

……Good heavens.

Approaching closer, Lee-won stopped and clenched his teeth. Woo-yeon’s face had now changed as if various eyeshadows and lipsticks had been smeared on haphazardly. She still wasn’t wearing a coat, and her legs were still bare. Every time the cold wind wrapped around those skinny calves, Lee-won felt as if his own legs were being whipped.

Did I really not know it would come to this?

Bitter self-reproach flooded in belatedly. His complacency was regrettable. Should he have reported it to the police? Handed her over to a safe shelter and contacted her school and home? Taken responsibility and protected her until she settled somewhere new?

……How far should I have helped you?

There is no limit to helping others, but there are limits to an individual’s ability, energy, and time. And those who ask for help don’t like to think about the limits of the one who gives. That’s why kindness returns as resentment.

Then should I not have interfered? You might have died earlier, but you might have been too scared and given up on suicide. You might have gone home. I might never have heard this kind of resentment.

“Mister, why did you save me?”

He could feel Woo-yeon’s voice growing more and more choked. Lee-won bowed his head. A dull ache rose in his chest. It wasn’t something he could answer honestly.

“With petty sympathy? Because you have so much money it’s rotting? Did you feel like you’d become God?”

Lee-won still couldn’t answer a single word. There wasn’t much wrong with what Woo-yeon said.

“You don’t understand why you get cursed at even after saving a life, do you! You’re wondering why you have to see this sight twice, aren’t you!”

……That’s right. I wonder. Just what kind of cursed fate has tied you and me together.