The Gray Wall of Injustice
I arrived at President Jin's residence but stood rooted in place for a long time without being able to cross the gate. My feet refused to move. I wanted to turn around and run, but I didn't even have the courage to do so.
It felt like an earthquake. In the past I had run away and fought back, but I had been living as if I was simply complying with whatever my father wanted for a long time now.
I hadn't slept for even an hour, and the exhaustion was overwhelming. When I pressed my eyelids hard, the blurry double image of my surroundings finally came into focus.
“...”
When I tilted my head completely backward, the endless gray walls came into view. No matter how many times I had seen them, the fence never lost its suffocating feeling.
The walls built to keep out everyone were always just suffocating.
“...”
The chairman of Dohak Construction, my father, always paid great attention to people's gazes. More precisely, he felt superior in the eyes of those who envied him. That was why he built this luxurious mansion on the most expensive land in the country.
He stacked walls tall enough to make it look like no one could even dream of crossing them.
People looked at this house with envy and praise as if it followed my father's wishes, but to me it was nothing but a pile of concrete that made me feel suffocated.
With a deep sigh, I crossed the gate.
*You think I would believe your fabricated story? Wake up and smell the coffee! Or do you want to go to jail?*
I was still angry at my father. But there was nothing I could do. My grandmother's life hung by a thread in my father's hands, so I was nothing more than a doll in his hands.
He had made me live like a doll.
With a bitter smile, I walked past the overly extravagant garden and entered the house.
“Five minutes late.”
“...I'm sorry.”
The stepmother who spoke without even looking at me as I sat on the living-room sofa was the one who had said I was late. Only after I stood in front of the sofa did the stepmother raise her head.
“I've told you before. No matter what happens, make sure to be on time for any appointment.”
“Yes, I will.”
The stepmother's unpleasant gaze wrapped around my entire body. My stepmother was elegant at first glance, but she looked haughty. She hated me with a vengeance. Yet it wasn't that her heart was narrow.
It was simply because I was a child born out of wedlock that she hated me.
My father was a man who was exceptionally prejudiced against women, regardless of his abilities. I had heard that the stepmother had married him knowing exactly what kind of person he was.
He met other women the moment he got married and couldn't control his bad habits, and in the end he had only three illegitimate children. He made his children from the stepmother grow up elsewhere until they were a bit older, then brought them back to the house.
No, he dragged them back to the house. The other siblings, like me, were children who had been forcibly separated from their loving families and carried the pain of it.
“It's not like you're going to cling to Baek Do-hyun with that half-and-half face of yours, right?”
“...”
“He's a match for someone like you. How can Baek Do-hyun even be worthy of you? If Baek Do-hyun liked someone with a face like yours, you wouldn't have even met him in the first place.”
I knew that all too well. Even without the stepmother telling me, I knew the differences between us better than anyone.
“Don’t be greedy and miss the one you want to protect. Think about my words and remember them well. It’ll help around the house.”
The one she meant by “the one you want to protect” was obviously my grandmother.
“Well, you wouldn't be able to help even if you tried.”
Such contempt was nothing new to me, so it wasn't hard to endure. The stepmother had disliked me from the beginning, but I didn't know the reason. Maybe it was because I was the same age as Jin Yeon-a. I could only guess.
Suddenly appearing, I was not only prettier than Jin Yeon-a but also had done well in university, so it was only natural that she would hate me.
Jin Yeon-a had wanted to eat me alive the moment she saw me, so for the four years I lived in this house, I didn't have even one ally.
So my grandmother was the most precious person to me. She was the only one who would stand by me no matter what I did.
“Let's eat.”
“Okay.”
Even though she hated me with a vengeance, the stepmother made sure I ate with her. Even after marriage, it was the same. She would call me once or twice a week to make dinner.
“Thank you for the meal.”
In reality, I had no appetite at all. I just wanted to sleep. If I just lay on the cold floor, I would fall asleep from exhaustion.
“Don’t leave any food on your plate.”
The stepmother hated leaving food on the plate. Once, when I had leftover rice because I had a cold, she made a big fuss. I knew she would definitely scold me if I left any food, so I picked up my spoon.
“Yes, I will.”
I picked up a large serving of rice and put it in my mouth as if I was used to it. I could feel the stepmother's gaze on me. After I swallowed the rice with a gulp, the stepmother glanced at the beef and potato soup. She naturally scooped some and ate it.
Only then did the stepmother's gaze leave me.
I picked up my chopsticks and took some potato stew. The sight of the potatoes made my throat feel tight. It was one of the side dishes my husband liked.
I knew he had been eating my cooking since I started coming to the house two or three times a week. So he had started to like the side dishes I made.
I often made side dishes for him, but because I had no talent for cooking, even the food I made tasted like it had gone bad. But he would eat it with such enthusiasm that I couldn't help but improve my cooking skills.
“Why aren't you eating? Are you going to do a memorial service in front of the food?”
“No. I'll eat.”
Even though he himself wasn't eating, the stepmother was acting as if eating would make her feel better. She shoveled the remaining rice and soup into her mouth one by one, unwilling to chew on it.
It was rough like chewing on sand, but I finished all the food without leaving any, just as the stepmother wanted.
“Why did you call me today?”
I asked, wondering if there was another reason besides feeding me.
“Do I need a reason to call you?”
It wasn't, but I let out a small sigh. If I had said that there was no need to call me just to feed me, I didn't know how the stepmother would react, so I pushed the words I wanted to say down into my chest.
“Eat everything and then leave. Come back on the weekend to eat and go.”
“...Yes.”
Even though she hated me so much, I didn't understand why she kept feeding me. I didn't say anything since I couldn't deny it, but I got up from my seat.
Now that I thought about it, I didn't see Jin Yeon-a. The third and fourth siblings had school, so was Jin Yeon-a still sleeping? If so, I wanted to get out of this house as soon as possible.
“Thank you for the meal.”
Without even glancing at me, the stepmother left the kitchen as if greetings were unnecessary. I decided to stop by the supermarket before going home.
He might not eat it, but I wanted to make side dishes for the first time in a long time.
Even though it was a place I didn't want to be, just like when I ate, he didn't like me, but maybe he would eat the side dishes I made.
However.
“I didn't bring you here to do something like this.”
Looking at the food filling the table, he let out a snort.
“It was... just because I had time... I made it. It wasn't anything special.”
I hadn't expected him to enjoy the side dishes I made. Seeing the potatoes for the first time in a while, I remembered how he used to smile brightly and say thank you whenever I cooked for him. I had only thought it would be fine if he just ate it without smiling.
It was arrogant of me.
“Don't even think about making that kind of thing. Think about what would make me happy.”
“...”
A large hand grabbed a handful of my hair. My head was tilted back, exposing my nape. He buried his lips there and bit down hard.
“For example, instead of food, you climb onto the table.”
Crash!
He swept the table clean with his hand. All the plates on the table rolled around the floor in a mess.
“What a fresh idea.”
Then he lifted me onto the table. Because of his last words saying he would eat me instead of the food, my face flushed with shame.
His dark eyes slowly traced from my head all the way down to my toes, as if I were the food.
The moment I couldn't bear to look at him and turned my head away.
He pushed my shoulder down so I lay on the table.
“...Ugh.”
His hand slid inside my dress. I knew better than anyone how he would react to that touch.
I tightly closed my eyes.